When I was a young girl of 15, I recognized a dependency occurring in my life. It frightened me, but in the throws of struggling through a torturous adolescence, I was reaping ways to numb my heartache.
And then the unthinkable happened, during one of my many self-inflicted-numbing sessions ——
—- and a few short weeks later, at the age of 15, I found out that I was going to become a mother.
[At this time, I won’t go into the dreadful details of how, when, where it all came to be, as it’s not important in this post….(perhaps another day)….]
I chose to embrace the new life that was coming into mine, and held onto faith that our Creator chose me for this journey, for reasons I didn’t yet understand. In hindsight, I see it as both a blessing, and a saving of my soul.
My boy gave me hope for my future. He taught me about unconditional love, and pure joy. Watching him grow was challenging (to say the least), but on this side of things, I can see now why I was chosen to be his Mum.
Motherhood saved me from a potentially devastating path, and for that I will be eternally grateful.
My heart goes out to those lost souls that find themselves on paths that no child ever willingly chooses. I pray that one day they will find the strength necessary to pull themselves out of it, and know that there are others out there that do not judge. When you experience the kind of pain and heartache that I have endured, you too will understand how unexpected tragedies can occur.
Thundering Silence 